seven years, a five year old and hundreds of rainbows

“A coincidence is a small miracle when God chooses to remain anonymous.” – Albert Einstein Kate and Ryder’s birthdays are seven years and two days apart. August 16 and August 18 respectively. Today, on Jackson’s Angel Day, Ryder is the same age, almost to the day, as Kate when her oldest brother died.  She was just five-years-old.  As the years pass, it’s hard to remember certain things about that day and time that we lost Jackson, but I will never forget Kate’s reaction to losing her best friend. It’s engrained in my head. The deep moans and gut wrenching cry from such a small body still rings in my ears to this day. Her happy, vibrant life changed in an instant.  When I look at Ryder and let those memories sink in, I can’t fathom...

Drumroll, please…

When I first started thinking about starting a nonprofit in Jackson’s memory, I did a lot of research. I didn’t know what I was doing or where I should start. I called lawyers for professional advice, I spoke to friends who work in development, and I prayed for guidance. Overall, the feedback I received was positive, but there were a handful of doubters. “If you aren’t raising millions of dollars, it isn’t worth your time,” some told me. Another literally laughed at my goals. And pretty quickly I started second guessing if I should do anything at all. But I knew in my heart this is what I wanted, and I kept going back to what Eric and I have said from the beginning. “If we can help one family, it’s worth it.” So I pushed forward with a stronger determination to...

june 10?

When I think about the date, June 10, nothing significant comes to mind. It’s not anyone’s birthday. It’s not a holiday. And I can’t recall anything significant happening on that day. But when I opened Facebook a few weeks ago, a memory popped up reminding me it was one of the happiest days during my 34 years. There weren’t any pictures to jog my memory. It simply read: “Today was the best day of my life!! Welcome home Jackson, welcome home!!!” Six years ago on June 10, 2011, after open heart surgery and almost two months in the Cardiac ICU, Jackson was discharged from the hospital and we brought our baby boy home. It’s not a day that sticks out in my mind because while I was thrilled to finally have all four of us under one roof, I was equally terrified. My body...

the numbers are in…

This had been a year in the making. When I thought about organizing our flagship event for JR Hearts 12 months ago, I had no idea what it was going to be. I didn’t even know what JR Hearts would look like yet. I sat around the table with three incredible women and we brainstormed. When it comes to doing anything in Jackson’s name, I can be pretty indecisive. It has to be perfect in my eyes. We had several concepts brewing, and after a couple of months, they morphed into the grandest idea. With Jackson’s love of music and dancing and Eric’s musical background and sound production success, an all day music festival filled with fun activities for the entire family just made sense. Thus, Jackson’s Jam was born. As we began planning and organizing, businesses started...

keeping my promise more than three years later

“Instead of asking why they left, now I ask what beauty will I create in the space they no longer occupy?” – Rudy Francisco A couple of days after Jackson passed away, my cousin called to offer her condolences. Through the tears, I told her, “Something good will come from this. I will make sure of it.” I don’t quite know where I found the strength to make such a grand promise because as I sat there on the phone, my heart was broken into a million tiny pieces. But I knew from the beginning that I would not let Jackson’s death be in vain. One of my greatest fears was that people would forget about my child. It scared me more than anything. As I started organizing our team for Briggs and Al’s Run just a couple of months later, I think I surprised a lot of...